This past weekend marked six months since we had the formal ceremony to say goodbye to my love. I never knew that managing grief would be so hard, go on for so long and take a toll on my body the way it has.
For over the past 20 years I have suffered from a thyroid disorder – hypothyroidism. I was diagnosed during my high school senior year at the age of 17, completely out of the blue. I was actually at the emergency room for a totally unrelated issue when the doctor noticed a bulge in my neck and encouraged my parents and me to look in to it. It turns out that I had what they call a “goiter” growing on my thyroid. Over the following months, after visiting a few endocrinologists we learned it was the reason behind my weight issues and a few other things.
Over the years I’ve been on and off meds as my level s (and weight) goes up and down. I haven’t been on meds in the past few years, my weight had been pretty consistent but 2016 was a great year health wise for me. Throughout the year I lost about 25lbs even though I may have gained and lost 5 -7 pounds every few months or so. My back pains had almost gone away due to the weight loss and I wasn’t haven’t as many breakups with my workout routine.
Fast forward to Feb 3, 2017… When his heart stopped, mine stopped. In a previous post I talked about how I scheduled my grief to last for 2 weeks and unrealistic that was. Even at the time I wrote that post, I thought I was headed to the other side of this grief but I was wrong. After about a month of paralyzing grief, I decided it was time to see a doctor. I’m a mom, daughter and business woman. I don’t have the luxury to grieve. I have stuff to do.
In addition to my doctor prescribing me antidepressants, we also checked my thyroid levels. And wouldn’t you know it – my levels are all wacky again. UGH! Grief and thyroid problems can present in the same ways: weight gain, hair loss, dull skin, moments of increased or decreased appetite, extreme fatigue, lack of motivation and depression in my case.
I’m not a doctor so I can’t say that grief is the medical reason for my latest round of thyroid issues but it’s what I believe. As I’ve been back on my medicine routine for a couple of months now, I’m happy to report that I’m no longer “wearing my grief on my face” as I would say every day I looked into the mirror, my energy level is slowing improving and I’m more motivated to work on my business – not just in it.
So why am I sharing this with you?” A couple reasons:
- If there is anyone out there sad, frustrated and feeling helpless in their grief journey, know you are not alone. It is a process that cannot be rushed and is unique to you and the relationship you had with your loved one that has transitioned.
- If you are grieving, don’t forget to continue to listen to YOUR body. If something doesn’t feel right or seems off, go and get it checked. Staying healthy is one of the best ways to honor the memory of your loved one.
As Your Next Big Move Catalyst, Twanna has worked as THE Business & Project Strategist for Empress Business Solutions. For more than 5 years, she’s worked exclusively with solopreneurs to start and grow their businesses. For more tips on how to stay more productive and motivated in business, please sign up for our newsletter.
